[转贴]猪肉涨价以后,猪八戒如此下场!
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 55pt; mso-char-indent-count: 2.5"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 22pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">猪肉涨价以后,八戒如此下场!</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 22pt; COLOR: red"> <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 194.25pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 18.5"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">文</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue">/</SPAN><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">秦恨海</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">唐僧师徒四人正在往西天取经的路上走着,突然网上传来消息称:现在大唐国土上猪肉全线涨价,某些地方甚至已逼近虎肉的价格。一些心急的农户生怕赶不上这个赚钱的好机会,硬是把一些母猪也宰了,以卖个好价钱。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">大家对于市场经济规律,已摸得八九不离十了。猪肉正涨价时,你千万别心疼母猪。因为如果等你的母猪生出小猪再养大,估计那时又是供过于求,卖不回饲料钱了。这叫吃一堑长一智,前些年的便宜猪肉可不是白吃的。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">打听到这个消息开始,八戒的头皮就一直发麻。虽说师傅悟空悟静都吃素,但人心隔肚皮,如果这猪肉越吃越少,甚至绝迹,自己身上这堆长了几千年的老肉,说不定便也成了稀世珍品,难免他人不起歹意。物以稀为贵,这也是市场规律之一。就像师傅唐三藏身上的肉,因为传闻吃后有长生不老之功效,使引得三界九天妖魔鬼神都动了贪念。小心,小心,千万小心提防!</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">仔细观察一番孙行者,八虚心里不禁犯了嘀咕:这些天,那猴头老拿眼睛瞅俺。时不时还从耳中掏出那个金箍棒,耍弄几下。有时却揪揪俺的耳朵,拂拂俺的皮毛,很贴心的样子,只怕不怀好意。这猴头什么时候对俺有过好感?什么时候善待过我?以前是轻则骂重则打,这些天突然和颜悦色起来,必是心怀鬼胎。只是这猴头精灵古怪之极,要以俺猪心度猴腹,却是有些难。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">再看沙悟静,还是一副忠厚老实的样子,但人不可貌相,海不可斗量,越是沉默寡言的人,越可能心怀叵测。这些天,沙僧和悟空常在一边窃窃私语,而后猴头驾着筋斗云不知哪里去了很长时间。回来后两人又暗笑不止。想必猴头又回大唐去作市场调查,更只怕那儿的肉价又上涨不少。哼哼,别以为被你们蒙在鼓里,你们绝想不到俺是大智若愚,扮猪吃虎。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">还有师傅,依旧是端坐马上,念佛不止,一副心如止水的样子。师傅是最不性急的人,也是城府最深的人。他一副懒洋洋的样子,其实目标明确,手段凶险,最为可怕。他的绝招只有一个字:拖。随着时间越来越长,猪肉越来越少,俺老猪的价值越来越高。等到市场上猪肉卖尽时,他便要出手了。那时,什么经也不用取,只消把俺给带回大唐,呈到太宗皇帝面前,还有什么不能到手?可惜人算不如猪算,这点小聪明,也逃不过俺老猪的水泡眼。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">时间一天天过去,眼看着悟空离开的次数越来越多,沙僧的眼神也越来越不怀好意,而师傅的念经声也越来越有气无力,甚至白龙马都好似已知道他们即将动手,走起路来也不那么自然了。这八戒的心病也越来越重。长此以往,这几百斤肉非交待在他们的手上不可。事不宜迟,走为上策。八戒偷偷写好辞职报告,惴惴不安地朝师傅走去。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">唐僧见猪八戒走近前来,忙叫住道:“八戒,过来一下,有事与你商量。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">想吃我卖我就直说,还商量个啥?八戒心里这么想着,还是慢慢地蹭了过去,顺手拖上钉耙。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">唐僧道:“此地距离西天,还有三五年的路程。你也知道,近来考察团的经费有些紧张,猴哥和悟静都在想办法……</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue">..</SPAN><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">八戒想:“他们能想什么办法?还不是想把俺老猪给卖了?以为我不知道?”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">唐僧接着道:“悟空前几天到大唐各地农贸市场上考察了几回,发现猪肉价格上涨后,其他农产品的价格也跟着上涨。我们不吃猪肉没事,不吃素可不行。再这样下去,口袋里的钱,维持不了几天了。所以我和悟空悟静开了个考察团团务会议,就如何开源节流、用好经费问题,作出如下决定:</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">一、从即日起,每日只管早餐(一两稀饭,一个馒头)。其余伙食,自行设法解决。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">二、为节省交通运输费开支,决定先辞退白龙马。背我上西天取经的任务,暂由你来负责。若他日物价平稳,经济状况有所好转,再考虚续聘白龙马事宜。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">三、为防止坐吃山空,即日起悟空暂离考察团,回御马苑打工去,看马赚的钱贴补考察经费。路上降妖伏魔工作,由你主抓,沙僧配合。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">四、大家的工资暂时不发,每月的通讯费津贴一律取消。你日后要往高老庄或嫦娥姐姐那儿打长途,请自掏腰包,团里不再报销。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">五、以上四条为暂行规定。如果物价继续上涨,考察团再想其他办法来解决经费问题。到时能省的就再省点,能卖的就卖一些,总要保证按时赶到西天才是。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">八戒听得,心中很是气苦。想俺老猪这辈子为你们做猪做牛接下去还要做马,整日介装疯卖傻卖笑哄你们开心,搞得像那些小秘书一样十足是看门的狗干活的牛挨骂的猪,到头来有福你们享有难我来担,真是好人台下受气坏人台上唱戏,这是什么混账逻辑?</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">你们虽然不是现卖了俺老猪,却把俺视作山西省洪洞县砖窑里的黑工,丝毫不管吃为俺第一要务,却要俺只做不吃,还不发工资,心肠竟如此歹毒!更可恨的是竟然还想囤积居奇,坐等肉价再上,到时大发其财,真打得好算盘!哼哼,我现在就先结果了自己,让你们做白日发财梦去吧!俺这一走,青天在上,法网恢恢,上头自然有人会来查办你等,还怕你们逃了不成?</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><FONT size=3><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">于是,举起九齿钉耙,照着自己的天灵盖就这么一下。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman"><FONT size=3>从此天下无猪。</FONT></SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P> <P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><STRONG><FONT size=6><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>于是,举起九齿钉耙,照着自己的天灵盖</SPAN></FONT></STRONG></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><STRONG><FONT size=6><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times></SPAN></FONT></STRONG> </P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><STRONG><FONT size=6><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>就这么一下。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></STRONG></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><STRONG><FONT size=6><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times></SPAN></FONT></STRONG> </P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 21pt; LINE-HEIGHT: 150%; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><STRONG><FONT size=6><SPAN style="COLOR: blue; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>从此天下无猪。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="COLOR: blue"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></FONT></STRONG></P> <P><FONT size=3><FONT color=#0000ff><FONT face=宋体><STRONG><FONT size=5>猪肉全线涨价,某些地方甚至已逼近虎肉的价格。</FONT></STRONG></FONT></FONT></FONT></P><P><FONT size=3><FONT><FONT face=宋体><STRONG><FONT color=#f70997 size=5>老百姓的眉头都皱了!</FONT></STRONG></FONT></FONT></FONT></P> <br><br>从此天下无猪。得改吃其它的肉类了......<br><br> <P><FONT size=3><FONT color=#0000ff><FONT face=宋体><STRONG><FONT size=5>俺听斑竹说,猪肉全线涨价,某些地方甚至已逼近虎肉的价格。以后猪骨头也可以泡酒了,当虎骨用。</FONT></STRONG></FONT></FONT></FONT></P>
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