麦克雷 发表于 2007-11-4 10:37

[转贴]暴强学生族•语出惊人

<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align=center><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 18pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">暴强学生族·语出惊人</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 18pt; COLOR: red"><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p><FONT size=3>&nbsp;</FONT></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">1 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">某次上课时,老师出了个这样的问题:“方志敏烈士就义前说过什么话?”有位仁兄带着耳机听随身听,没注意自己的音量,替方志敏同志说出了那句话:“来吧!用钱砸死我吧!。。。。”</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">2 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">同样是上课,老师要我们说出自己喜欢的座佑铭,俺的一位同学毫不犹豫的说了</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">出来:“杀人不过头点地,要死也是屌朝天!”</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">3 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">某天就寝熄灯后,某同学心血来潮,站在寝室中间唱歌:“你说你,想要搞,偏偏不带避运套,现在好,怀孕了,生下孩子你要不要。。。。。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">(</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">有需要者请参考张宇的用心良苦)整首歌都被来查房的班主任听到。。。。。。。</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">4 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">某人的梦话</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">---</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">上帝啊!给我个女人吧!</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">5 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">还有个更强的梦话,某深夜,我突然醒来,听到某人呓语</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">---</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">翼德贤弟,扶我上马(三国演义)五分钟后</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">---</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">好头颅,不止谁来砍?(隋唐演义)五分钟后</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">---</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">小李</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">飞刀果然名不虚传!(小李飞刀)五分钟后</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">---</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">异次元空间!(没记错的话,应该是圣斗士)五分钟后</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">---</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">狠狠,嘿嘿,哇哈哈哈(据我猜测,可能是八神三段笑。。。。。。)我真的很想知道他做的是什么梦。。。。。</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">6 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">我一位同学某日去见一位女网友,回来后,大家问他怎么样,只见他咬牙切齿的说:“别提了,他母亲的,整个一宫里的太监</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">---</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">要什么没什么!”</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">7 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">一次我和同学们出去吃早饭,一同学正在吃着,一条狗跑到他面前摇尾巴,他望了那条狗半天,说了句暴强的话:“叫声爸,我就给你吃。”</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">8 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">一日上课时,我同学讲小话被发现,老师横眉竖目的望着他:“这个班上我最不喜欢的就是你。”那位同学听后一字一顿的回答到:“万分荣幸!”</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">9 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">上课时,老师提问:“道教的创始人是谁?”某同学大声答到:“老子!”</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">(老字请重读。。。。。)</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">10 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">某语文课,老师叫我们对对联,他出了个上联:“观当今时代,学生须有心上进。”某同学被勒令写</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">800</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">字检讨,他对的是:“看现在世界,老师得无耻下流。。。。。”</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">11 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">某日出去喝酒,一大票人喝得醉熏熏的,有位不怕死的仁兄冲到公共电话亭,拿起话筒就拨</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">110</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">,接通后,大声说道:“喂!刚才是谁打我扩机?!”</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;</o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">12 </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: Times New Roman; mso-hansi-font-family: Times New Roman">刚才念帖子给前排同事听,同事跟我说了个更寒的:某天晚上寝室里某人说梦话:“小姐贵姓啊?”,两秒中后,自己接:“叫我小丽就行了”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">.... <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p>&nbsp;<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/2007114103654620.jpg"><BR><BR></o:p></SPAN></P>

泽雅 发表于 2007-11-4 10:51

<FONT size=6>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <EM><FONT color=#ee1111>惊人话语篇连篇!哈哈!</FONT></EM></FONT>

吉祥宝贝 发表于 2007-11-4 13:10

<FONT face=华文行楷 size=7>&nbsp;&nbsp; 腮帮子笑疼了要负责哈</FONT>

大度英雄 发表于 2007-11-4 18:31

原文由 安安6652 发表: <STRONG><FONT size=5><FONT color=#ff0000><FONT face=宋体>的确语惊四座!!<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200711414373202.gif"><BR><BR></FONT></FONT></FONT></STRONG>

晓月清风 发表于 2007-11-4 18:45

原文由 泽雅 发表: <FONT size=6>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <EM><FONT color=#ee1111>惊人话语篇连篇!哈哈!</FONT></EM></FONT>

兔宝宝 发表于 2007-11-4 19:29

原文由 大度英雄 发表: 原文由 安安6652 发表: <STRONG><FONT size=5><FONT color=#ff0000><FONT face=宋体>的确语惊四座!!<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200711414373202.gif"><BR><BR></FONT></FONT></FONT></STRONG>
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