[转贴]教师的情书
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 28pt; mso-char-indent-count: 2.0"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>有位地理老师,经人介绍结识一位女工。见过一面后,女工到外地学习,地理老师提笔写起情书:“亲爱的,我们虽然只见过一面,可您就像磁铁一样把我紧紧吸住了。你知道我是教地理的,如果用地球来比喻,你是东半球,我是西半球,我俩在一起便成为完美的地球了。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>没过多久,地理老师收到那位女工的信,信中写道:“按照你的说法,地球上只剩下我们这孤独的一对,我不干!”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:PersonName w:st="on" ProductID="历史"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>历史</SPAN></st1:PersonName><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>老师的情书</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>一位<st1:PersonName w:st="on" ProductID="历史">历史</st1:PersonName>老师一天挖空心思给女友写了这麽封情书:“现实是今天,历史是昨天,我们相爱,昨天和今天便天然地连接在一起了。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>几天后,那个女友回信写道:“只有昨天,今天而没有明天,我们活着还有什麽想头呢?”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>化学老师的情书</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>一化学老师为了向女友表露自己专业知识的渊博,特意用化学术语给女友写了一封情书:“我是氧原子</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">O</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>,你是氢原子</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">H</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>,我们的结合就如水--</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">H2O</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>--一样不可分割。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>女友立即回复,信中写道:“如果照你信上说的,很明显多了一个氢,我真担心会是第三者。你该想想办法,给那个氢也找一个。不然,我们实在无法结合。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>数学老师的情书</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>一天,数学老师收到了女友的回信,信上说:“亲爱的,如果结婚后,我做出了无理的事,也还是有理的吧!”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>原来,他给女友的信是这样写的:“亲爱的,你是正数,我是负数,我们都是有理数,我们俩简直是天生的一对,地造的一双。如果我们结了婚,我向你保证你说咋样就咋样!”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>物理老师的情书</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>教物理的男老师对坐在对面教音<st1:PersonName w:st="on" ProductID="乐的女">乐的女</st1:PersonName>老师产生了爱慕之情。这天下午,办公室里只剩下他和女音<st1:PersonName w:st="on" ProductID="乐">乐</st1:PersonName>老师,他赶紧从备课本上撕下张纸,慌慌张张写了一行字,交给了她。女音<st1:PersonName w:st="on" ProductID="乐">乐</st1:PersonName>老师接过纸条,张开一看,只见上面写:“你是阴极,我是阳极,我们相靠,便产生爱情的电!”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>女老师一边折着纸条,一边对物理老师说道:“如果我们相靠能发电,那就不妨试试看,起码停电不用再点蜡烛了。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>语<st1:PersonName w:st="on" ProductID="文">文</st1:PersonName>老师的情书</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>某中学有位语<st1:PersonName w:st="on" ProductID="文">文</st1:PersonName>老师,年岁不大,说话文绉绉的。一天,给对象写了这样一封情书:“你是夏夜的景,你是春天的云,你是潺潺的小溪,你是漂亮可爱的百灵,你是轻盈的舞步,你是悦耳的歌声。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>女友收到信后,提笔在信的背面写了这麽一行字:“天啊!你唯独不爱我这个人!”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>政治老师的情书</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>政治老师给女友写起情书来:“亲爱的,你是存在,我是意识。根据唯物论的原理,存在决定意识。我愿永远做您忠实的仆人。”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: " Roman?? New ?Times mso-hansi-font-family: Roman?; Times>一个星期后,女友回信曰:“亲爱的,根据辨证法的原理,在一定条件下,意识对存在有反作用,一旦我们结了婚,你不就成了主宰我的皇帝了?!”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P> <br> 哈哈,有意思 <FONT size=7>老师的命咋就那么苦呢</FONT> <FONT size=7>职业病人的情书!</FONT> <FONT face=隶书 color=#0000ff size=7><STRONG><EM>职业病的悲哀!</EM></STRONG></FONT>
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