麦克雷
发表于 2008-5-11 21:53
<SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-font-kerning: 1.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: ZH-CN; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">一天深夜，一个年轻女子经过一家精神病院时，突然后面传来“哇”的一声。女子扭头一看，一个一丝不挂的男子正在向她追来。女子吓得拔腿就跑，后面的男人紧追不舍。不好，前面是一条死胡同，女子万念俱灰，跪在地上哭着哀求道</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: "Times New Roman"; mso-font-kerning: 1.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: ZH-CN; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: 宋体">:</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-font-kerning: 1.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: ZH-CN; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“你愿意干什么就干什么吧，只求你不要杀我。”男子狡黠地笑了笑说：“真的？那现在你开始追我。”<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/2008511215238187.gif"><BR><BR></SPAN>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-5-11 21:51
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt" align=center><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">有一家疯人院。一天，院长想看看有多少人病好了。就让护士在墙上画了扇大门儿。只见一个个病人都疯了一样的往墙上撞。院长很失望，忽然他看见只有一个病人无动于衷。院长很是高兴，忙跑过去问他：“难道你不想跟他们出去？病人答道：“这帮傻帽，我这儿有钥匙！”<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200851121516854.gif"><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200851121516854.gif"><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200851121516854.gif"><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200851121516854.gif"><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200851121516854.gif"><BR><BR></P></SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-5-11 21:50
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt">1.</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">蛇、蚂蚁、蜘蛛、蜈蚣几个人在家里搓麻将。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt">8</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">圈之后，烟抽完了。大家商量让谁去买烟。蛇说：我没脚，我不去，让蚂蚁去。蚂蚁说：蜘蛛八只脚，比我的多，让蜘蛛去。蜘蛛说：我的脚再多也比不过蜈蚣大哥呀，让蜈蚣去吧。蜈蚣无奈，心想：没办法，谁让我脚多呢？于是蜈蚣出门去买烟</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt">.</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">一个多钟头了，不见蜈蚣回来，两个钟头后，还不见蜈蚣买烟回来。于是大家让蜘蛛出去看看，蜘蛛一出门就看见蜈蚣在门口坐着，蜘蛛很生气，问：你怎么还不去呀？大家等着呢。蜈蚣也急了，说道：废话！你们总得等我穿好鞋吧！</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-5-11 21:59
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align=center><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">可恶的电影院！</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red"><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">一天一家小影院放映一片子。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">广告写到</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><<</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">七个男人和一个女人的故事</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt">>></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">并有说明：一美女莫名晕倒，七男人强行拖入森林；等待美女的……</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">众人都觉很有吸引力逐买票入场，等到电影放映时，大屏幕出现：</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">……</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">《白雪公主》</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">众人气急败坏的走了。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">（二）</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">隔天众人再次路过小影院，见广告有所变化。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">广告写到</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><<</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">七个男人和一个女人的故事</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt">>></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">并有说明：</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">一如花美女与七男人的数天惊涛骇浪般的销魂（绝非《白雪公主》）。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">众人这次觉得比上次更有吸引力，而且说明不是白雪公主，逐又买票入场。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">结果大屏幕出现：</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">《八仙过海》</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">众人全晕在场内了。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">第三天</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">当所有人都决定再也不进入这家影院的时候，</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">却看到广告上写道：本院为真情回报广大支持国产大作的朋友</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">特别吐血大放送！！！</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">《七个可爱男孩和一对年轻夫妻曲折的故事》</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">附言写道：七个可爱的男孩趁年轻夫妻无防备的时候一个一个的进入他们的家</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">却反被年轻的夫妻所治服</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">但最后却出现大逆转情况</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">丈夫被杀</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">年轻美丽的妻子落入七个男孩的魔掌……</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> <o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">本片情节曲折精彩感人</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">为广大有婚夫妇培养下一代所必看之佳作！！！</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">大家听说情节曲折精彩感人而且还是可爱的男孩和年轻夫妻的故事</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">于是又都禁不住诱惑买票进场了</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">经过漫长的等待之后</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"> </SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">屏幕上终于出现画面了只见上面清晰的打出了</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt">3</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">个大字《葫芦娃》众人当时就全都吐血了</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt">~</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">真不愧是吐血大放送……</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-20 22:24
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">翻……到……死……</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">有一户潘姓人家，长辈过世。</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">家祭时，请来了一位乡音很重的老先生来当司仪。</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">讣闻是这么写的：</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">孝 男：潘根科</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">孝 媳：池氏</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">孝孙女：潘良慈</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">孝 孙：潘道时</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">但这位老先生老眼昏花又发音不标准。</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">当他照著讣闻唱名时，凡是字面上有三点水的或左边部首都漏掉没看到。</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">于是就给他念成这样子：「孝男，翻……跟……斗……」</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">孝男一听，直觉得很奇怪，但又不敢问，于是就翻了一个跟斗。</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">接著又说：「孝媳，也……是……」</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">孝媳一听：「我也要翻啊？」于是孝媳也翻了一个跟斗。</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">再来：「孝孙女，翻两次。」</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">孝孙女一听，想想爸妈都翻了，我也翻吧！于是就翻了两个跟斗。</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">此时孝孙心想：「老爸、老妈都各翻一次，姐姐也翻两次，那么我要翻几次？」心里想著想著就开始紧张了：「怎么办？」</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">只见老先生扯开喉咙，大声念出：</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">「孝孙……翻……到……死……」</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"> <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/2008102022240946.jpg"><BR><BR><SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-20 22:22
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""><FONT size=3> </FONT></SPAN><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">麻将风波</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red"><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 阿月要亲自下厨煮饭，问正在打麻将的母亲，“要洗多少米？”妈妈没有听到阿月的问话……</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 一面将手里的牌打出，一面说到</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">:"</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">九筒</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">"!<o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 结果……那一锅饭让她们家足足吃了一星期……<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081020222039870.jpg"><BR><BR></SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> </SPAN><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">减肥的原因</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 隔壁小胖终于发誓减肥了。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 因为，毕业招聘会上，有人对他说：“哥们儿，让一下，你当着我的手机信号了。”<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081020222056228.jpg"><BR><BR></SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> </SPAN><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">房价</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 昨天，经过房产公司门口，看见有一只壁虎在这家房产公司门口看房价，这是正好有一条大鳄鱼远远爬了过来，小壁虎上前一把抱住了大鳄鱼的腿，并大声喊妈妈。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 大鳄鱼老泪纵横：“儿啊，为省钱买房都瘦成这样了。”<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081020222122308.jpg"><BR><BR></SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> </SPAN><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 鸡过河</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 小偷偷了一只鸡</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">,</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">正在河边给鸡拔毛</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">,</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">这时一个警察走了过来</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">,</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">小偷急忙把鸡仍到了河里</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">.<o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 警察问</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">:"</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">你在干什么</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">?</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">河里是什么东西</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">?"<o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman""> 小偷说</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">:"</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">那是一只鸡</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">,</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">它要过河去</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">,</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">我在这里帮它看衣服……</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">"<o:p></o:p></SPAN></P>
流青
发表于 2008-10-20 22:55
<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081020225432872.gif"><BR><BR>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-20 22:18
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align=center><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">口渴</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red"><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">爸爸把儿子哄上床后，回到自己的卧室准备睡觉。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“爸爸！”儿子叫道。</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“什么事儿？”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“我口渴，给我拿杯水好吗？”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“你刚才不是喝过了嘛？快睡觉，我已经关灯啦！”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt">5</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">分钟后……</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“爸爸，我口渴，你就不能给我拿杯水吗？”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“我刚才不是说过了嘛！你再叫我揍你！”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">又过了五分钟……</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“爸爸！”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“又怎么啦？”</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">“你过来揍我的时候一定要带杯水！”<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081020221756951.gif"><BR><BR></SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align=center><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">夏日的蚊子</SPAN></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 26pt; COLOR: red"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">有一天，两兄弟在睡觉</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">弟弟对哥哥说：哥今天蚊子好多哦～</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">哥哥说：把灯关了蚊子就看不到我们了</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">后来弟弟真的把灯关了</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">忽然间一双萤火虫飞了进来</SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋体; mso-ascii-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"">弟弟很紧张的说：哥惨了，蚊子提着灯笼来找我们了……<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081020221819794.gif"><BR><BR></SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 14pt"><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-23 19:55
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏">6.</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏">天是蓝的，海是深的，男人的话没一句是真的；爱是永恒的，血是鲜红的，男人不打是不行的；男人如果是有钱的，和谁都是有缘的，男人靠的住，猪都会爬树。 <SPAN lang=EN-US><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>7.</SPAN>一群蚂蚁爬上了大象的背，但被摇了下来，只有一只蚂蚁死死地抱着大象的脖子不放，下面的蚂蚁大叫：掐死他，掐死他，小样，还他妈反了！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>8.</SPAN>小孩把妓院养的鹦鹉偷回家，一进门，鹦鹉便叫：搬家啦！看见他妈妈又叫：老板也换啦！看见他姐姐又叫：小姐也换了！看见他爸爸又叫：我<SPAN lang=EN-US>cao</SPAN>还是老客！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>9.</SPAN>漫漫人生路，谁不错几步！家庭要照顾，情人也得处！家里有个做饭的，外面养个心善的，对桌坐个好看的，远方有个思念的！保住二，守住一，发展三四五六七！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-font-kerning: 1.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: ZH-CN; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>10.</SPAN>一只小狗爬上你的餐桌，向一只烧鸡爬去，你大怒道：你敢对那只烧鸡怎样，我就敢对你怎样，结果小狗舔了一下鸡屁股，你昏倒，小狗乐道：小样看谁狠。 <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081023195451259.gif"><BR><BR></SPAN>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-23 19:54
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏">１<SPAN lang=EN-US>.</SPAN>老夫妇去拍照，摄影师问：“大爷，您是要侧光，逆光，还是全光？<SPAN lang=EN-US>"</SPAN>，大爷腼腆的说：“我是无所谓，能不能给你大妈留条裤衩？<SPAN lang=EN-US>" <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>2.</SPAN>老婆语录：允许你喝醉，允许你勾妹，但晚上必须给老娘归队，如果你敢伤我的心，伤我的肺，老娘一定把你的第三条腿打残废，让你的鸟鸟永远打嗑睡。 <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>3.</SPAN>两个饺子结婚了，送走客人后新郎回到卧室，竟发现床上躺着一个肉丸子！新郎大惊，忙问新娘在哪？肉丸子害羞的说：讨厌，人家脱了衣服你就不认识啦！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>4.</SPAN>俩老夫妻某日吃晚饭时突发奇想：裸餐！找找从前的感觉！脱光后老太婆道：我还有反应耶！乳房还和年轻时一样发热！老头斜了一眼道：耷拉到汤里了！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>5.</SPAN>四只老鼠吹牛：甲：我每天都拿鼠药当糖吃；乙：我一天不踩老鼠夹脚发痒；丙：我每天不过几次大街不踏实；丁：时间不早了，回家抱猫去咯。 <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081023195341378.jpg"><BR><BR><SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-23 19:57
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏">11.</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏">传说今晚，阴魂不散，死光又现，鬼魂四处转！愿鬼听到我的呼唤，半夜来到你床头，苍白的脸，幽绿的眼，干枯的手抚摸你的脸，代我向你说一句：晚安！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>12.</SPAN>男人，总是笑容满面，两眼放电，不是发病犯贱，就是坑蒙拐骗！女人丰胸细腰，放荡风骚，不是掏你腰包，就是放你黑刀！这年月男怪女妖，小心中招啊！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>13.</SPAN>你走在路上，一母狗扑向你从你的脚上咬了一块肉，迅速吞下去，你伸脚正要踢它的时候，狗含着泪说：<U>你打吧，反正我肚里已经有了你的骨肉！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></U></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>14.</SPAN>老鼠没女朋友特别郁闷，终于一只蝙蝠答应嫁给他，老鼠十分高兴。别人笑他没眼光，老鼠：你们懂什么，<U>她好歹是个空姐。 <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></U></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-font-kerning: 1.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: ZH-CN; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>15.</SPAN>朋友问蝙蝠怎么会下嫁给老鼠，蝙蝠眼含泪花，意味深长：唉！那天他吃了伟 哥，火力壮，一下蹦上天花板，让他得了手。 <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081023195646918.jpg"><BR><BR></SPAN>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-23 20:01
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>26.</SPAN>小明告诉妈妈，今天客人来家里玩的时候，哥哥放了一颗图钉在客人的椅子上，被我看到了。 妈妈说：“那你是怎幺做的呢？” 小明说：“我在一旁站着，等客人刚要坐下来的时候，我将椅子从他后面拿走了。” <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>27.</SPAN>一天在拥挤的公车上的一段对话情形如下：一个站着的怀孕妇人对着他身旁坐着的一位男子说：『你不知道我怀孕了吗？ 』<SPAN lang=EN-US>(</SPAN>想要他让座<SPAN lang=EN-US>.... ) </SPAN>只见男子很紧张的说：『孩子不是我的！』 <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>28.</SPAN>仅仅是一阵风也罢了，偏偏是这样永恒，仅仅是一场梦也罢了，偏偏是如此真实，你低头不语，我却难以平静，我终于禁不住要对你说，：下次放屁时，说一声！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>29.</SPAN>一对恋人在山中被野人抓住说：你们吃掉对方的大便就放了你们。恋人做到了，归途中女人大哭，男人问其原因，女人伤心的说：你不爱我，不然你不会拉那么多！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 16pt; COLOR: fuchsia; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>30.</SPAN>一日，某君的老婆生小孩，他急急忙忙跑到医院看望，等了<SPAN lang=EN-US>n</SPAN>个小时，产房里传来了哭声，他高兴大喊，我做爸爸了！这时医生满脸愁容走出来，告诉他，小孩子先天畸形。某君呆在那，还没明白什么原因，忽然产房里传来了他老婆的喊叫：都怪那天杀的，看贴老不回贴，你们自己看着办！<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200810232013332.gif"><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200810232013332.gif"><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/200810232013332.gif"><BR><BR><SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P>
天天游
发表于 2008-10-23 20:51
<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081023204948658.jpg"><BR><BR><BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081023205036940.gif"><BR><BR>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-23 19:59
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏">21.</SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏">昨天梦见上帝说可满足我一个愿望我拿出地球仪说要世界和平，他说太难换一个吧，我拿出你的照片说要这人变漂亮，他沉思了一下说拿地球仪我再看看。 <SPAN lang=EN-US><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>22.</SPAN>一女奇丑，嫁不出去，希望被拐卖。终于梦想成真，却半月卖不出去。绑匪将其送回，她坚决不下车，绑匪咬牙一跺脚：走 ，车不要了 <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US> 23.20</SPAN>年前爸爸抱着你等车，人都笑话孩子长得难看，爸爸哭了。一卖香蕉的老大爷拍拍爸爸说：“大兄弟别哭了，拿只香蕉给猴子吃吧！真可怜，饿的都没毛了。” <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>24.</SPAN>飞机上，一只鹦鹉对空姐说：“给爷来杯水”，猪也学鹦鹉，对空姐说：“给爷来杯水”，空姐大怒，将鹦鹉和猪都扔下了飞机。这时鹦鹉对猪说：“傻<SPAN lang=EN-US> B </SPAN>了吧，爷会飞。” <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>25.</SPAN>有个老农在地里锄地，一只乌鸦飞过，拉了泡屎掉在老农脸上，老农抬头大骂：“<SPAN lang=EN-US>CAO </SPAN>你妈！出门也不知道穿条裤衩！” 乌鸦说： “<SPAN lang=EN-US>CAO</SPAN>！你 丫 拉屎穿裤衩呀！”<SPAN lang=EN-US>v <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081023195917903.jpg"><BR><BR><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-23 19:58
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>16.</SPAN>我花一毛钱发这条短信给你，是为了告诉你——我并不是一个一毛不拔的人。比如这一毛钱的短信就是我送你的生日礼物。 <SPAN lang=EN-US><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>17.</SPAN>蚂蚁懒洋洋地躺在土里，伸出一只腿，朋友问你干嘛呢？蚂蚁：待会大象来了，绊他一跟头。 <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>18.</SPAN>喜鹊来，妈妈说这是喜鸟是客；燕子来，妈妈说这是益鸟是客；乌鸦来，孩子问你也是客人吗？乌鸦叫：<SPAN lang=EN-US>Yes</SPAN>，吾乃黑客！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>19.</SPAN>某美女发现口红太重，拿湿纸巾擦拭后扔到路上。一老头拣起，端详半天突然醒悟，追上说：姑娘，这超薄的就是容易掉呀！ <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: #3366ff; FONT-FAMILY: 华文新魏; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-font-kerning: 1.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-language: ZH-CN; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA"> <SPAN lang=EN-US>20.</SPAN>黄瓜失恋痛哭，茄子安慰她：爱情不单只是甜美、只是沉醉，还有心碎、还有流泪。唉！谁让你爱上洋葱的？ <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/2008102319587276.jpg"><BR><BR></SPAN>
鹰鹰
发表于 2008-10-23 15:06
<BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/2008102315537265.jpg"><BR><FONT size=7>真好笑！</FONT><BR>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-22 21:27
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><U><SPAN style="COLOR: red">兔子不吃窝边草<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></U></B></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 15pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.0"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">八戒自言自语：近水楼台先得月，玉兔那厮整天在嫦娥旁，唉！ 悟空道：放心吧，兔子不吃窝边草。 <SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 15.05pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.0"><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><U><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">禁止吸烟<SPAN lang=EN-US><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></U></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 15pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.0"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">售货员对一个正在抽烟的顾客说：先生，我们这里禁止抽烟。 顾客回答：这可是在你们这里买的香烟。售货员：那又怎么样，我们还卖农药<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081022212719178.jpg"><BR><BR></SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-22 21:26
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 15.05pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.0"><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><U><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">谐音成诗<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></U></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 15pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.0"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 15pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.0"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">老师在课堂朗诵诗词，并要求堂下学生笔记 老师诵读到题为《卧春》的诗：《卧春》，暗梅幽闻花，卧枝伤恨底。遥闻卧似水，易透达春绿。 一名学生天生痴傻，竟是如此笔记的： 《我蠢》，俺没有文化，我智商很低。要问我是谁，一头大蠢驴。 笔记本交上，老师看后昏去一周<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081022212621575.jpg"><BR><BR></SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-22 21:30
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><U><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN>封建－老婆的唠叨 <SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><SPAN lang=EN-US><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></U></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 7.5pt; mso-char-indent-count: .5"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">一天，老太和老伴一起看电视。一段广告后是转播选美比赛。 老头一看脸红了，起身进屋了。老太笑了：这老头还挺封建的。 一会，老头回来了，端正地坐在电视机前，只是，架了一副眼镜 老婆的唠叨 妻子：你的耳莫炎是什么时候好的？ 丈夫：就在你喉咙开始发炎的那天<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><U><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN></U></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><U><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">没有那么聪明的毛驴<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></U></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 22.5pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.5"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">一个聪明人在乡下散步，看到磨房里面一头毛驴在拉磨，脖子上头挂着一串铃铛。于是聪明人向磨房主道：你为何要在毛驴的脖子上挂一串铃铛呢？ 磨房主回答：我打瞌睡的时候，毛驴常常会偷懒，挂上铃铛以后，如果铃铛不响了，我就知道这个畜生又在偷懒<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><U><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN></U></B><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><U><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">关于月亮的笑话<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></U></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN></SPAN><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">月亮掉在水池里了 夏天的晚上，小聪和小明在水池边乘凉。 忽然，小聪一抬头看到了天上的半圆形月亮，就对小明说：真奇怪，上星期晚上我看到的月亮是个圆的，今天怎么只剩了半个了呢？小明还没有回答，小聪忽然又叫了起来：原来如此，你看，另外半个月亮掉在水池里了。<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081022212943757.jpg"><BR><BR></SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><SPAN lang=EN-US style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></P>
麦克雷
发表于 2008-10-22 21:29
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><B style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><U><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312"><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN>领导<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> </SPAN><?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></U></B></P><P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; TEXT-INDENT: 22.5pt; mso-char-indent-count: 1.5"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; FONT-FAMILY: 仿宋_GB2312">蝴蝶妈妈对女儿说：＂还是嫁给蚊子吧，个子小点，人黑点没关系，好歹人家是个领导啊！＂蝴蝶女儿撇撇嘴说：＂它是哪门子领导啊？＂ 蝴蝶妈妈正色道：＂它当然是领导了，只要它一开口，人家就拍手鼓掌，不是领导是什么！＂<SPAN lang=EN-US><SPAN style="mso-spacerun: yes"> <BR><IMG src="/attachments/Upfiles/20081022212834787.jpg"><BR><BR></SPAN><o:p></o:p></SPAN></SPAN></P>